Dancing with Myself


I went to a wedding this weekend.  It was beautiful, it was lovely, it was awesome!  It was my brother’s wedding, and I was thrilled to be a part of it.  It was my little brother’s wedding.

He’s not that little, I mean, he’s 27.  I am 29 and my wedding hasn’t happened, and I’m totally ok with that, because I haven’t found someone I want to walk down the aisle with, and I refuse to settle.

The thing is, a couple times during the evening, I was told the following things:

“You’ll never get a boyfriend if you keep doing that [taking ridiculous selfies].”
“I hope you can find someone to be happy with.”
“Your time will come.”

The ‘your time will come’ didn’t bug me quite as much because it wasn’t quite so condescending, despite the fact that I don’t think any of them were meant to be condescending.  In fact, I suspect the last two were meant to be encouraging, but… anyway.

The first one made me jump to my own defense.  See, normally I’ll take those comments and accept them, assuming that perhaps the person is right and I am doing something that’s keeping me single.  After reading a blog post though about food shaming and a lady who stood up for herself, I decided I’d do the same.  The conversation went down like this:

Me:  (sitting taking ridiculous selfies of myself at the dinner table)
Someone:  You’ll never get a boyfriend if you keep doing that.
Me:  No.  I don’t think that’s true.  There’s someone out there who will love me for all that I am, stupid selfies and all…. and if there isn’t, well, then I’ll be happy being single because I don’t want to change just to get a guy to like me.

I felt pretty proud of myself, because normally I internalize that stuff, but while I do believe the person who said it was just telling me something they thought would be helpful information, I don’t believe it to be true for a second.  I’ll find someone someday with a silly side who loves that I take stupid selfies.  It’d be awesome if he’d even lean in for a couple every once in a while.  I’ve been taking selfies since before selfies were cool… legit… I’d turn my disposable cameras around backwards and then be mad when I’d develop the film and half of the pictures were of half of my face cut off because it’s hard to angle them when you can’t see a screen.  Technology has made them a lot easier!  I’ll post some of mine from my bro’s wedding for you to see… haha I figured I wasn’t gonna look that dolled up again until my own wedding day.  Some people say they’re attention seeking.  Some say they’re narcissistic.  I think they’re just plain fun, and I don’t care what anyone else thinks.

 

To “I hope you find someone to be happy with” I responded that I’m already happy, and that a man can make me miserable if he’s not a good choice, so I’m not just going to settle for someone for the sake of being with someone.

 

Lastly, to “your time will come” I simply said “thank you.”  This person was pretty much a stranger, and didn’t really know me, so had no way of knowing that I don’t resent my lil bro for getting married before me.  Also, can I tell you how much I LOVE my sis-in-law?  My brother’s got fantastic taste.

 

With my new-found self-confidence that evening, I got out on the dance floor and danced like no one was looking, even though people were watching.  This is not like me, I promise.  I had grandparents watching, and sometimes they were laughing… because, well, I was doing the lawnmower and the shopping cart… I deserved to be laughed at haha.  But you know what?  I had fun.  I dragged my grandmother out on the dance floor, and I taught her how to slow dance.  That was so much fun, and it’s a memory I’ll cherish forever.  My grandma had never danced before, and she even came out on the dance floor during a fast song and started shuffling and moving her arms to the beat… determining that “I think it’s just about having fun!”  and she’s right.  So it doesn’t matter who’s watching.  It doesn’t matter if anyone thinks you don’t look amazing.  It doesn’t matter if all you know how to do is shuffle to the beat or jump up and down (hello high school lol).  My step-Dad taught me how to polka, and it was fun!  and I don’t care if I didn’t look good doing it.  My Grandma was right, it’s just about having fun.

 

Anyway, selfie time!  Here they are!  Allow me to state that as someone who enjoys taking pictures very much, the ability to play with the light from behind me, whether it be from the sun-reflected lake or bouncing off the glorious fall leaves… it’s fun.  I suspect the admonition that stupid selfies won’t get me a boyfriend probably comes more from the 2 silly ones (which, by the way, I didn’t post on Facebook and am only putting here to make a point), but anyway…. here they are.

 

 

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Weekly Photo Challenge: Selfie


Apparently selfies are starting to be displayed in art galleries and art shows… so…. wanna add my best selfie to the shows?

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However, normally my selfies look like this:  (this set was all the result of the brilliant decision to spend 18 hours in a car driving to Georgia last March Break.)

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Split Perspectives ~ Snow Day


I woke up this morning to the abrasive sound of my obnoxious text message ring tone, twenty five minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off.  It was my student teacher.

“I heard on the radio that all buses were canceled today, so I looked on the board website and it says all schools are closed and the transportation is canceled… what does that mean??”

At 6:35 am, my heart exploded with joy.

“Michaela* my dear, it means go back to bed!”

And that’s what I did.  I got up, went to the bathroom, and then crawled back into my warm, toasty bed.  The dog didn’t even stir… she stayed curled up in a tight little ball at the foot of my bed.

IMG_3081*(this picture was taken later, after I woke back up… it was dark when I went back to bed the first time :p)*

Sure, before I fell back into a blissful sleep, I updated Facebook and texted a few of my coworkers to make sure they knew, but I mostly drifted back into a lovely, deep sleep.

I slept until 10:30, then did a few things around the house before going out to tackle the mess that the overnight snow had made of my driveway and sidewalk.  While I was out, I was very grateful (for one of the only times this winter) that it has been so frigid outside.  When it’s not frigid, the snow comes down heavy and thick, full of moisture, and it takes forever to move with a shovel.  Every time that kind of snow shows up, I’m always just a little envious of the neighbours beside and across from me who have snow blowers.  Today, though, the snow slid almost effortlessly across the pavement of the driveway and the sidewalk, and the only trouble I had while shoveling was that I’m starting to now know where to PUT the shoveled snow.

While shoveling, my trusty Canada Post mail carrier came and dropped off my mail, right into my mailbox, her head bopping along to some presumably rocking tunes, and then she plodded on through the piles of unshoveled snow and the snow banks to finish her route.  She moved quickly and with purpose, I’m sure partly because it’s a big job but also because it was freezing cold out this afternoon.  At -16, feels like -25, I’d hustle too.  I thanked her, but I don’t think she heard me through the headphones.

When I was done shoveling, I took my phone out to the snow hill I’ve been creating in the front lawn, I flopped into the fluffy powder, and I took some selfies.  (If you haven’t seen that video I linked there on the word Selfie, please take 8 minutes and watch it.  It’s great.)  Then I took the pooch into the backyard and we played!  We played fetch with some sticks, with some tennis balls she found buried in the snow, and just with the snow in general.  Her favourite game is when I kick snow in her face, and she tries to catch it.  No joke… she’ll just stand in front of me and stare until I kick snow in her face.

IMG_3032 IMG_3039 IMG_3050IMG_3017The rest of the afternoon I’ve spent chilling.  I watched a movie, and now here I am.  Blogging.

WordPress’s Weekly Writing Challenge this week is to write a story from multiple perspectives.  So here are a couple more Snow Day perspectives!

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Christine’s alarm went off at 6:45 am.  Time to get up, get the kids ready for school, and get to work.  She got dressed slowly.  She was exhausted from the day before.  Working two jobs to pay for private school and the after school care necessary to let her work two jobs was set to kill her, she was sure.

‘Only a matter of time,’ she thought, as she plodded into the kitchen.  She switched the news on in the living room to listen to the weather as she made lunches before waking the kids up.

“All schools closed and all transportation canceled due to inclement weather.”

“NO!” Christine ran to the window.  “I have to go to work!”

Sure enough, the phone rang a minute later.  It was Jen, calling her part of the private school phone tree to let Christine know that because the public schools were closed, so were they.

“Do you want to take my kids for the day?” sighed Christine.  “I have to go to work, and my parents are in Jamaica.”

“I can’t!  I’m so sorry!”

“That’s ok… I guess I was kidding,” Christine sighed.  “I’ll find somewhere for them to go.”

She called all around, finally finding another Mom who happened to be able to work from home.  They had daughters in the same class, and Sheila was happy to take Christine’s daughters until 3:30, when the babysitter would pick them up from Sheila’s.

Christine woke her girls up, got them dressed, packed them games and some snacks, and dropped them off at Sheila’s before heading off to her first job — delivering mail for Canada Post.  She liked the job, but it was awfully cold outside and she dreaded the fact that as she started, she doubted many houses would have shoveled their sidewalks, driveways, and porches yet.  It was going to be a long day.  Waitressing to finish off the night would be busy, she was sure.  No one ever wants to cook on snow days.  It always seems like a good day to go out.

Christine picked Samantha and Luke up from the babysitter’s at 7:30.  She took them home, gave them baths, and put them to bed.  She flopped into bed herself and read until she fell asleep.  What a long day.

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Madeleine woke up to her blaring alarm at 5:15 am.  She had her math exam at 10, and even though she went to bed at 2 for all the studying she’d been doing, she sincerely felt like she needed to study some more.

“Don’t over study,” her teacher had explained.  But he didn’t get it.  He didn’t know how much anxiety and stress this stupid exam was causing her.  He didn’t understand how difficult she found math.  He just didn’t see the hours she spent crying in frustration over her homework.  He didn’t get that no matter how hard she tried, she just wasn’t going to understand it.

She thought if she could just study for a couple more hours, she might get it.  She might be able to handle this.  She downed a protein shake, and by 5:30, she had set everything out at the kitchen table, ready to study.  She crammed everything she could into her brain for an hour and a half, and then started to gather her stuff up to go have a shower and be ready to catch the bus to school.  Her Mom came out of her parents’ bedroom with a big smile on her face.

“Honey,” she exclaimed!  “It’s a snow day!  Sweetie, you can go back to sleep!”

Madeleine burst into tears.  Everything she’d just crammed into her brain would not be there tomorrow, and she’d have to do this all over again.  She hated how hard math was, and she ran to her bedroom in tears to curse this stupid snow day.  No one got it, not even her Mom.  She cried herself into a fitful sleep, knowing she’d just have to keep at it whenever she woke up.

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Please note that Michaela is a made up name for a real person, and that Christine, Jen, Samantha, Luke, Sheila, Madeleine, and her Mom are all fictional characters invented for the sole purpose of this writing prompt.  I made them up.  Cool, huh?  This is my brain not on report cards.